Someone had to remind me so I'm reminding you, too, of the perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading toward 70!
Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
No one expects you to run ~ anywhere.
People call at 9pm and ask "did I wake you?"
People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
Things you buy now won't wear out...
You can eat supper at 4pm.
You can live without sex...but not your glasses.
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
You quit trying to hold your stomach in ~ no matter who walks into the room.
You sing along with elevator music.
Your eyes won't get much worse.
Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.
You won't remember where you saw this list.
And you notice this is all in big print for your easier-reading convenience.
If you want to share this with folk you know, you'd better do it right now ~ before you forget.
Oh, and before I forget, here's one more piece of advice:
NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, TAKE A SLEEPING PILL AND A LAXATIVE ON THE SAME NIGHT!!