|image from eDigg.com|
Sadly my life can be summed up in the title of this post, sweetie~pies, and to be frank I am sick and tired of living this way *sigh* I also rather suspect you are sick and tired of me telling you so often how sick and tired I am!
I've really struggled with feeling low these past two or three weeks. I hesitate to describe myself as feeling depressed; I have suffered with depression on and off over the years and know that how I have been feeling recently is nowhere near as bad as I have done in the past. Nevertheless it is still debilitating to feel so much below par, and something of a struggle to cheer myself up.
I know that recent health issues have definitely not helped. I slipped in a muddy patch whilst dog-walking and fell over about three weeks back, which left me feeling very shaken (and more than a little embarassed!) and with a pulled muscle in the back of my right thigh. The following week I came down with a rotten cold; I seemed to be on the mend by the weekend but last week back came the dratted cold again :-( There seem to be some horrible persistent bugs doing the rounds at the moment as I know of quite a few folk who have had colds following this same pattern.
So yes, all that hasn't really helped with how I have been feeling mentally. Everything always seems to come at once, doesn't it my loves? I know that the key to changing my life is in my own hands, and I just have to keep plodding on, but my word it really is not easy at times! I do feel guilty about feeling this way; after all I have so very much to be thankful for and should feel blessed that my life is rich in so many ways. That still doesn't stop the "low" feelings, though ~ to be honest it just adds to them!
The fact that I am indecisive about so many things in my life is also part of the problem. Not to mention the fact that I could probably procrastinate for England! I could do so much with my time, my loves.....if only I stopped "thinking" and actually started "doing". I really need to set out goals and make some big decisions as to what I would really like to do, instead of all this flitting about from one thing to another. After all, that has led to ~ well, nowhere to be honest.
Spring is on its way and this feels like the perfect time to change direction: new life, new growth, spreading of wings. Time, methinks, to start living, making the best of things and moving forward :-)